Faith, the size of a mustard seed!

There was a time, I was very sad and had succumbed to momentary despondency. I just coiled myself in foetus position on my couch and as I lay there wailing about my perceived misery, I told Jesus something like this….I told him He’s not a loving father and that He was really trying my patience. I accused Him of being a liar by reminding Him that He failed to keep His promise. (Well, as Christians we believe scripture is the Word of God. And the Word of God is the breath of life. And life and death is in the power of the tongue. Now all these three statements are heavy weight champions within themselves and require a dedicated post because they are so intense. So I’ll refrain from deviating for now.) Then I followed that by pointing out that Jesus Himself said{Word/scripture} if one has faith even as small as a mustard seed, even the impossible would be made possible. I cried foul. I blamed Him that after so much perseverance in faith for such an extended period of time, I was still revolving in circles and had not really seen my reward. Well, I love my God with all my heart and soul and mind and I wasn’t really accusing Him of being a liar. It was my faint and vain but desperate attempt to corner God and put Him in a spot just like little children say things like, if you claim to love me so much, you must give me the candy. Otherwise, it’s just proof that you don’t love me.{wink, wink} Anyways, I later spent that day in prayer whilst fasting and forgot all about my little rant on the couch that morning.

The next day again, I spent in prayer and fasting and moments before 3pm{the hour of mercy/time of death of Jesus}, I started reciting the Divine Mercy Chaplet. I am well acquainted with this prayer and usually say it quite mechanically with no concentration and a blank mind. That afternoon was no different. I pranced from one room to the other with the rosary beads in hand reciting the chaplet of mercy. My mind was absolutely blank and emotionless. I was neither concentrating on my prayer, neither was I elsewhere occupied in thought. I was certainly not wondering about my complaints from the previous day. I was just rushing through my prayers because I wanted to complete reciting 9 of them. So speed was of the essence. But at 3pm, I felt like God was replying to my complaints when it suddenly occurred to me that the emphasis wasn’t only on the size of the mustard seed. It’s a seed…..a seed! Your faith is your seed. Jesus is God. If He only wanted to focus on the size/quantity of your faith, the creator of the universe certainly knows that a grain of salt or a speck of dust is smaller than a mustard seed. Why then, in all His wisdom did He use this analogy of a mustard seed? A seed takes time to germinate, to sprout, to develop roots, grow into a tree, fight diseases and pests and finally it bears fruit. It’s a gradual process. Have you ever seen a full grown tree with ripe fruits spring forth overnight from a single seed? Someone needs to care for it and regularly water that seed. Your sapling may be pale, or as they describe it in gardening terms, ‘leggy’ and it may need a crutch for support. But, it sure aint gonna give you fruits overnight. The fruits of your labour will be relished only if you continue with patient perseverance to nurture and care for that seed that you sowed/ the plant that you have now. If you give up at the stage when your tree is full and luscious but awaiting the right season to produce fruit, wouldn’t it be silly after all that time and all that effort? Even worse, if you sow that seed and carelessly forget about it, don’t ever water it. You sow it; you never abandon it. The thing about operating in faith is many times you cannot see which stage your seed is in. So you cannot predict harvest time. If harvest season is just around the corner and you walk away now, wouldn’t that be futile? I tell you solemnly, if you really want something and it does not clash with the spiritual laws{righteousness, justice, forgiveness etc.}, sow your seed of faith, water it and nurture it. Then wade off those pests and insects that eat at your plant by telling you that it aint gonna happen. If your plant gets diseased, treat it. Watch that seed. Keep watch and one day you will taste its fruits.

The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few.  -Luke 10:2, Matthew 9:37

Faith is a seed and a seed needs to grow. Your faith needs to increase/grow and not decrease irrespective of what you see happening on the outside. Stand firm in faith. Let the roots grow wide and deep. Your seed may be small and you may start out so small, weary and timid. But your seed, if you let it grow…it will grow as big as a 20 feet tall mustard tree slowly but surely. If any of you has tried their hand at gardening, you know just how lovely it is to eat the fruits of your own labour. Everything just tastes so much better. You will learn patience and appreciation and sooooooo much more. After all, it was never just the destination, but the journey that mattered all along.

Excerpts from Matthew 14, John 6 and also Mark 6 {same incident recorded thrice} Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray.Later that night, he was there alone, and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it. Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid”.“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water”.“Come,” Jesus said.Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”

In the beginning, Peter just looked at Jesus and his faith was strong. He knew Jesus would never let him drown. When you keep your focus on Jesus, your faith will be strong. Then Peter looked at the wind and the storm and fear kicked in. He began to doubt. So he started sinking. He was overwhelmed by the things that were more powerful than him as a human being. Certainly, human beings aren’t equipped to walk on water! Being a fisherman he knew that well enough. But let’s give God some credit here. Did He not create the whole world and all that it contains. What storm won’t obey Him? In all fairness, let us give Peter some credit too. He was the only one who desired to and was willing to take a leap of faith by stepping out of the boat. I am certain everyone of the disciples would have wanted to walk on water with Jesus! They had the desire. But they had no faith. They did not dare to imagine/seek the impossible. Peter had faith; but he suddenly succumbed to doubts and fear when the situation worsened. Fear is the opposite of faith. A lot of us don’t dare to seek the impossible. Some of us dare to dream but cower in the midst of a storm. And there are those who persevere and withstand all the storms in faith. When you take your eyes off Jesus, you will be overwhelmed with the mighty storm. Just don’t focus on the situation/storm you are in and continue to let that seed grow.

The men were amazed and asked, “What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey him!” -Matthew 8:27

But without faith it is impossible to please him. -Hebrews 11:6

Yours Faithfully,

Ruelha